Monday, August 3, 2015
Once I start falling away from Joy, why must I cry before I can feel better? Why must I fall so far before I can begin to soar again? If my fall is sparked by being let down by someone I had faith in, is there a way to avoid lighting that spark without losing connection with humanity? Or must I choose between deliberate isolation and this painful, crashing, repeating wave of emotions? I am getting better at staying even and happy for longer periods, but, when I crash, I crash hard. The crying usually happens on the way back up. Perhaps the way to avoid falling so far is to cry more often? Hopefully soon, I will be spending most of my time feeling like laughing. Baby steps, I guess.